2003-11-19 - 2:57 p.m.

Got Latte?

Y'know, if I worked at Starbucks and somebody came in and ordered an Grande "latte" I'd give 'em a big glassa milk. Why? CAUSE IT MEANS "MILK" IN EYE-TALIAN, MENDICANT!

I think "Cafe Latte" is what they meant, but took the idea, twisted it into a bastardized branding tool and called a coffee, Eye-Talian "milk".

But then again Yanquees have a habit of making their own words. Like, "tuna-fish" and "Freedom Fries".

Now fuck off. I have a chicken-bird salad-plant sandwich-bread to eat.

0 of you fuckers have been accounted for.

old shit. - newer shit.

2003-11-19 - 1:27 p.m.

Served Her Right, Dumbass..

I believe that if you was all whupped as children you'd not think you could hit me with a ruler and you'd EXPECT to cry if you did so.

Note to Underlings: Don't hit me with shit unless you want to cry.

For this I make no apologies for I never strike my neophytic Underlings. Cajole, taunt and intimidate, sure, but it's not yet come to Pimp Slappin'.

0 of you fuckers have been accounted for.

old shit. - newer shit.

2003-11-19 - 1:12 p.m.

Fuckin' FUCKERS!

OK, this is the 2nd time in a MONTH the Vancouver Province has put a fucking VIDEOGAME as a leading front page story. A FUCKING VIDEOGAME! Yeah, there's FUCK ALL happening at home and around the world that'd warrant a front page. Sure.

This shit fucking pisses me off. A new study says that a shit-load of Grade 3-6 year olds are playing games like Grand Theft Auto. And that GTA is a demon and should be burned with the Joyce and Sallinger books and the all the Jesus Hating Beatle albums. Well, maybe not to that extent, but that's the sensationalist tone of the article.

Parents wanted warnings. They got them. Stores sell the shit to kids. Not the VG company's fault. Parents too fucking lax to make sure their kids aren't playing Ho-Killer games? Not the VG company's prob. Kids playing? Not the VGC's...you get the idea.

These are fucking VIDEOGAMES. Y'know why people are blaming VGs? BECAUSE WE ARE THE MOST FAULTLESS SOCIETY ON THE FACE OF THE EARTH! Well, maybe the Chinese beat us, but we're up there.

Think of it: Parents are afraid of their kids. It's true. When I was a kid everyone got a smack when they needed it. For the most part (except in MY fucking case) it was just a whap upside the head to smarten you up. Conditioning as it were. Now you raise yer fucking voice to yer kid and they're yelling abuse. Beat the SHIT out of the little fucker and you're getting hauled off. Kill them, skin them and roast them and eat them and you're a fucking PSYCHO!

But I digress.

Kids aren't afraid of their parents the way we were when we were kids. Parents don't kiss going on anymore - they're fucking eunuch guardians. Obviously (of course this is a generalization...it IS ME after all) they can't be held accountable for their fucking mistakes and oversights. And the kids can't be held responsible. And the vendors can't be responsible. So lets blame the makers.

So I have an idea: Lets fucking blame McDonalds for the fat bastards that can't get off their asses to learn to throw a fucking baseball and grow to get teased in school for being such obese greaseballs who'll end up taking their father's .45 and shoot the neighbourhood slut because HE PLAYED A VIDEOGAME WHERE A GUY KILLED A CHICK.

USE YER FUCKING HEADS, YA MOTLEY GAGGLE OF TWATS!

The Matrix caused Columbine. GTA caused the snipers. Mary Fucking Manson causes suicide.

Use-your-FUCKING-HEADS!

I'm gonna spell this shit out. Kids need guidance. They need someone to MAKE ABSO-FUCKING-LUTELY SURE they know that something as obvious as "Don't kill people" is how you're supposed to live. I'm no fucking parent, but I can GAR-ON-TEE you that my kid is gonna fear the Son's Wrath. No beatings like I got, but a whap in the ear never killed anyone. That being said I'm, for the most part, talkin' out my ass here.

Videogames, fast food, music, etc are out there. They're aimed at kids. Ya wanna stop that? Stop buying them. Campaign against it. Do whatever, but I can tell ya ain't nobody gonna stop Big Bucks. Deal with it is my advice. Teach yer kids that there's a lot of fucked up shit they're gonna experience in the future and learn em a good solid moral base - by whackin' them when they need it for example.

Here's another idear. Limit the fucking XBox. Send the little fat bastards out to PLAY. Enroll them in a sport. In a hobby. CHAIN THEM TO A FUCKING BIRDFEEDER just get them the fuck OUT!

The Rev and I have come to the conclusion that 4 consecutive generations of sterility is the only way to fix things. If I only had the HOW...

0 of you fuckers have been accounted for.

old shit. - newer shit.